We're all freaks, Stop judging. #NOSLUTSHAMING

It's a no win game for people in 2015. It's either we fuckin to find love, fuckin because we are broken inside or fuckin to fuck. All of them gives you brownie points except for fuckin to fuck. (Yes, I love the word. Lol) It's an interesting concept as I sit around and watch people talk about their friends or exes or acquaintances and judge the number, act or person(s) in their sex life. I'm not above it- don't get me wrong, but why is sex something we can take so judgementally? We spend a lot of our public life putting claims on who people are diggin out, but in our quiet moments either acting or fantasizing on our sexual impulses. Now, I'm not saying everyone is as sexually liberated as I and some of my friends, but I am saying that far more than a little bit of people are "cutting up" sexually and preaching to people publicly about sex.

There are a couple of different type of people I spot all the time that have a more indirect way of approaching sex. Let me entertain that thought for a minute.

The "Boyfriend" Experience

The funniest one to me is always the one that doesn't "hook-up", but wants the "boyfriend experience". The boyfriend experience is when someone wants to be baited into the bed. They don't want you to necessarily take them anywhere but they will come to your place at 2AM to cuddle. These people are hilarious to me because it's too much for their mouth to simply say, "I want a nut." They want to be more coy and waste people time by having you stay up to watch a rerun of Fresh Prince before they give you the goods. Did I just get mad? I think I did. Lol. Of course, as much as I laugh and joke about it, I always oblige. After all, cuddling ain't all that bad especially when I already know where it's going. The messed up part though is those are normally the ones that feel the need to get upset with you and call you a "hoe" or "punk" because you only answer at 2AM. First, you set that standard. Secondly, I did what you ask to get what I wanted. Isn't that the premise anyway?

The "What Did I Do Last Night?" Experience

The other one that tickles me is the "I'm so fucked up, I don't remember nothing" person or the "I never would do this sober" dude. Pause. Yes, being inebriated makes you a little looser, but it doesn't bring anything to the forefront that wasn't there in the first place. Everything you wanted to do sober, you now just have an (IN)valid excuse. These are the same people that go out of town a whole lot so that they don't have to see the people for awhile that they have these experiences with. Blaming it on the alcohol is so antiquated, though. If it works for you, it works. Hell, they usually only happen on peak weekends so I don't get mad at those either.

The "It's Too Good... You Gotta Wait" Experience

Another one is the "I got good sex so I'm holding out on you" scenario. Not to be funny, it's usually the receptive partner: male or female. If a dude got "good dick", he seems to want to share it with the world (I ain't mad though... Lol). This person wears the tightest underwear and never seems to have clothes on. This person usually loves porn and watches with the door closed. Also, they are normally head masters and can do it with their eyes closed to completion (because head ain't sex). We know these people. Unfortunately, I am a bit biased to this group because they never seem to be as good as they say and, after a couple dates, if you ain't giving me something mind blowing, it isn't ending pretty-- but it will end.

So, yes, we know all these people. Some of them might have some of our characteristics. Those are all pretty normal and most of us either function with those mentalities daily, have the best sex with someone with those mentalities or a combination of both.

Here is the one that for some reason we judge the harshest, though:

The "Hoe"

The hoe. First, let me define this person so we can be on the same page: the "liberated, I do who I want, I have no limits, I want to try everything" person. You know, the "cum dump" at the one sex party we went to because our friend drug us there. Or the friend that never has a man but always has a date over late. Or the "drops to their knees" when the door closes without a word guy. Or the person in a relationship that calls a third over from time to time because they have an agreement. Those people.

I am not sitting here saying that we shouldn't have a sense of a moral compass when it comes to sex. I'm also not here to say that everyone should be sleeping around with everyone because that's not for everyone (and everyone's not doing it when they are for the right reasons). I am saying that we should stop judging people based on their sex lives. Shaming people based on their sexual conquests is a promotion of all kinds of stigma. Further, we know the more we do something the better we are at it. I, for one, don't want to be too much more of a teacher. If we go even further, most of the people who are liberated sexually are doing the exact things we want to do but won't. Let them live. Be quiet and live vicariously through them.

-The Normal Anomaly