#NOFATS is ok with me.

You know, "cuffing season" is quickly approaching. Cuffing season- the time that people decide to become interested and settle down between Pride Season and the New Year; time to get comfortable, lay up, "Netflix and chill" and the holiday season; time in the year that people are more interested in being in relationships. This also corresponds with the "fall and winter" gay's season. Fall and winter gay's season- the time when layers are appropriate and fashion is more.. umm.. expansive. Also, the time when you need a cute little bear or cub to cuddle up with.

Not for everybody though.

Some people still deeply believe in "No Fats/ Thicks/ Chubs". Some say it's condescending, some say it's prejudiced, some say they are missing out on the voluptuous group of gay individuals. I say that it's preference and that is absolutely okay! I definitely identify with being thick and have embraced that connotation. On the other hand, there are several reasons why being rejected on social media, geosocial apps, in person or meeting guys through friends is perfectly appropriate. Hear my 4 reasons out:

1. Being rejected is a part of life.

Rejection is absolutely essential. Now, people should have tact , but saying what one doesn't like is important. A lot of people seem to rather be lied to or coddled into a situation in which they are with people who make them "comfortable in their uncomfort". What I mean by that is: they want people to say things like, "You are so cute, but.." or "You not that big, but.." or "I normally wouldn't date a big guy but.." I understand we are ever evolving and changing, but don't date me based on potential for change, date me because you like me where I am. So, if that means rejection at the very beginning or before I ever have to speak, I'm more than okay with that.

2. Preference is the first indication a person knows what he wants out of life.

Preferences are where we build our character. Of course, anything done in excess can be too much. On the other hand, we all have an ideal person in our head. For many people (including a good amount of big guys), that person is slim or muscular and masculine. We say that is prejudiced and superficial but when we talk about materialistic things such as car, house, job, etc they are must haves-- even if we have them all and they aren't asking for any of it. Must haves to you are options for someone else: all preference. I agree with the fact that dating is expensive and I'm not willing to always foot the bill for someone who isn't stable, but it's still a preference. So, why can't someone like my fat ass? It's ok. Just as you have a preference, let them.

3. Everyone is not going to like what you bring to the table.

I am such a picky eater. I can be hungry as hell but you bring me one of the many things on my list of DO NOT EAT and I'll stay hungry. I just have a very strict list of foods that I like and No, I don't want to try anything new. You mad? Lol. Seriously, though, that's how it is in dating. No matter how well packaged you are, where you graduated, what labels you may have on, someone is not going to be attracted to it. You don't have to be a big guy-- it goes for everyone. This one dude I had a crush on always dates bigger guys and I just thought he was" it". I approached him and ran my game; told him how attractive he was, love his community involvement and his style. He responded he was flattered and thought I was attractive too, but I was too masculine for him and that he only likes super fem guys. Sometimes, it's not the package or the meal. Sometimes, they just don't want to eat what you offer.

4. I would rather not be a fetish.

"Big boys got good booty." "Big boys are freaky." "Big boys got mean head game." "Big boys are good for the winter." "Big boys surprise me with their aggression." No. No, no, no, no. Not saying no, its' not true. I'm sayin no, I'm not about to be put in a corner for your sexual fantasies or (worse) because you think I'm desperate and will go in for anybody that opens their legs. No, love. My size doesn't in any way make me feel inadequate.My size doesn't in anyway add or subtract to my sexual prowess. My size doesn't in anyway make a decision of what we are going to get into behind close doors. That seems to be the infatuation with thicker guys, though. I'm down with me being a preference, just not being a fetish.

Big Boys: it's the time to capitalize on your size! On the other hand, don't be mad if you get rejected. It's all good!

- The Normal Anomaly